Sunday, June 23, 2013

Airport A-Hole

One of my favorite sports is people watching.  There's no better place to do this than at the airport.  Hubs and I were recently in a small, tropical locale waiting for our flight home.  I settled in, kept my eyes peeled and didn't have to wait long for the show to begin.

A lady was totally losing her mind because she lost her $400 pair of sunglasses.  If she said it once, she said it a dozen times, "$400 pair of sunglasses!"  Yeah lady, we get it.  You spent a shitload of money on a pair of sunglasses.  She immediately accused the man who helped her carry all her shit into the airport of taking them.  "He took them!  I know he did!"  Off she went.  I didn't see this ending well.  I imagined security would soon be pulling out the rubber gloves and digging in her ass for those "$400 sunglasses" if she got too obnoxious.

She insisted, "I'm not leaving this country without those glasses!!!"  (Enjoy your stay, beeyotch!)

While we listened to her drama, Hubs noticed that she left her bag in her seat while she stormed off in a huff.  He suggested that we alert someone of the unattended bag and report that it was making us nervous. (I love that man!)  We sat there laughing as we imagined the scenario going down....

"Yes, officer, the lady who left it looked VERY suspicious.  We think SUNGLASSES may be a code word of some sort between her and her companion.  If she gets mad when you ask her about it, I'd say she's up to something.  Especially if she mentions that they cost $400."

We laughed and laughed as the folks around us no doubt wondered what the hell was so funny.

If you ask me, the lady's first mistake was bringing a $400 pair of sunglasses on vacation.  I have a $12 pair of sunglasses that I bought for travel over 15 years ago.  I swear, I could toss those babies over the side of the boat then find them during a dive.  Cheap sunglasses are like a damn boomerang.  You can't lose them!

But this lady was totally losing her shit over these glasses.  Turns out, she quickly  found them and was a new woman.  I wonder if she apologized to the people she accused....  I doubt it.  Some folks tend to always jump to the absolute worst conclusion.  They shoot the messenger then go on their way.  You know what I call someone who does that?  An asshole.

If you can afford to spend $400 on a pair of sunglasses, you should be able to afford to lose a $400 pair of sunglasses. No matter what your socioeconomic status, if you go full asshole on hardworking people after YOU are at fault, then you are an arrogant asshole.  Think twice.  Choose your battles.  Don't ruin someone's day or quite possibly cost them their job with your arrogance. But, if you do, apologize.  Profusely.  Make the effort.  Money doesn't buy class. 


  1. I saw a lady lose in the airport one time on her husband because she said he lost one of her bags. She then aired about ten years of their drama so anyone at that gate could hear it. Turns out she forgot they checked that bag.

    1. I'm sure she apologized to her husband for the misunderstanding, right? LOL

  2. My favorite is the drunk woman flying from NYC to AZ to go to alcoholic treatment---she had a plane change in PHX. Well, naturally, she consumed quite a bit of liquor on the flight and went beserk at the PHX airport--so bad in fact that the PHX police had to subdue her with handcuffs. She was such a lunatic, that in her efforts to get out of the handcuffs, she turned and twisted to the point where she strangled herself to death via the handcuffs.....and then her family had the gall to sue the PHX airport/police! My only question is why did they allow her to fly alone knowing they sell alchohol in planes AND she had a change of planes in PHX? Sad she died, but how she died is funny---she accidently strangled herself with handcuffs?

    1. Holy shit! That's a bad way to go. I never would have even thought it possible to strangle yourself to death with handcuffs!